A little rain inside me, a little pain inside me. A little dose of mellowness to compromise the life, in a precise amount.


Friday, June 11, 2010

Being Single

Are you familiar with the rush in your blood when you see somebody hot in the supermarket, buying some perhaps high-protein milk? Or when you find a hot guy in a book store, reading some broad and heavy stuff? Or even better, the urge you have when you notice somebody hot in the gym, lifting his dumb-bell, has been watching you?

And although you've tried so sincerely to play hard-to-get, to ignore those hot guys, and not to turn your head around following his bubble ass, there's like this devil, somewhere between your brain, heart, and Mr.P, advocating you to eat them alive. The next second in your mind? You, him, bed. Steamy, sexy, and sleazy.

Like last week, when I visited a gorgeous mall newly-built in B-town. The mall is still new, still cold, and still crowded, and to my surprise, was full of good-looking people. It's like you're being outside B-town without actually going out of the town. So, there I was, celebrating an eye-fest, awe to awe, eating the man-candy, and playing the boy-toy.

I've been trying to so hard to behave, you know. Not in a queery-queeny way, of course, but at least, I know that I must try to be a little discreet, right? I mean, throwing stares at people who you don't really know is not quite polite, isn't it? And I don't really need to be more obvious than I already am, do I? Well..

So I wonder, as I stepped in back to my bed-closet that night. Is it in our DNA that we're always ending up trying -and wanting - to find a partner? The urge to satisfy our biological needs? That somehow it is inevitable? The obsessing over some guys? The pathetic miserable need to want someone as if it is the missing ingredient to a perfect home-made cooking? The image - hot body, flat abs, tight biceps and any-other-ceps - that never fails to make us waow-ing for a while? Hell, a fellow blogger next door even suggests some castes based on physical appearances and he's sure proud with his body.

So it is our DNA to blame?
But then, if it is so inherently natural, then why are we trying so hard to bind ourselves? One thing for sure, if it's our DNA, then we're not really alone, right? There are plenty of guys who share the same interests with us - if not to say every single one of them. 

I do believe that all the single gays are actively hunting; either for the Mr Right or Mr Right Now. See the AJ club? Crowded. See the flourishing of sexual services? It's everywhere to be found - easy money, profitable, and lots of fun. And it further suggests that we crave for some intimacy. 

But the first question is, why? Why we can't be just single and happy, enjoying the most of and from ourselves? Then, the second question, what does it take to involve in a sexual-and/or loving relationship?

But does not-being-single have anything to do with happiness? Is it true that love comes in as the missing piece to our jigsaw puzzle? Even if it's true, it's sweet and adorable, but are we really defined by the guy we love? Aren't we supposed to be happy and whole before we indulge in relationship? 

I think I mentioned this before in one of my previous blogs. Happiness comes from within. We can be happy even we're single. We're supposed to be happy if we want the happiness. We don't just want, act, or try to find happiness. 

All we need to do is be happy. 
And it doesn't have anything to do with being single or not, does it? 

So here it is: the final equation for today: Being single, and happy. :-) 

1 punches:

JC said...

I am single and loving it. alone? yes. lonely? no. end of story :)