I sent him off with so much smiles... (part 1)

Some memories are not to be forgetten. You simply can't forget, even though you have tried so hard, so willingly to let go all your past. But no matter how many times you said goodbye to that past, it keeps coming back to you. No matter how many times you resolutely decide to move on, it keeps haunting you on your sleepless night.

Or maybe it's just me.. I dont know.

All I know, I still remember how we first knew each other. We texted each other every now and then, intended to be only friends. But then I was in a bad shape. I was really devastated when JT left. He was also in a bad shape; someone he'd been chasing had just rejected his love. And we're just two persons who happened to be comforting each other. Soon, he stated his intention on me, how he wanted to take a chance on me.

So, long story short, he started to call regularly, every Saturday night. Or every now and then when he's down and he felt like he wanted to hear my voice to cheer him up. And I get used to it. And I feel in love. He's a nice guy. I was 18 and foolishly holding up to my imagination of love and relationship. We haven't even met; cheesy, isn't it? But I believed in him. And love is simply blind, isn't it?

The first time I cried with him was when I failed my test to this university at Jakarta. We're two fools who spent the night crying over the phone. He texted me more regularly after that, making sure that I was okay. That he could take a little more waiting for me..

The first time we met? It was one hour before midnight. It was the last hour before my birthday ended. He came from Jakarta to Bandung, right after his working hour, which got extended due to some extra work load. He hadn't had his dinner; he bought the only tix left, which was so expensive at the time. He didn't know Bandung, I was new; so I gave him my address, hoping somehow he would find me. And he did find me. He smiled when he saw me. I was so nervous that I didn't even remember how to breathe.I was so touched that he's willingly to go through all the difficulties just for me - I mean, sometimes, people are just giving up when they face a lil bit difficulties, right? He did stupid things but he didn't resent it because he knew I was worth it.

Then he asked me if I was still in. If I wanted to his boy.

I smiled. It was dark. So I asked him back if he still remembered the story he had told me before, about him going to Bali alone. There was a Caucasian who asked him if he wanted to be his one night stand, and if the answer was yes, he could hold the Caucasian's hand.

He said yes.

And I held his hand.

And he was like, Yiippeee!!

He kissed me that night.

He hugged me so tight that night.

We spent the morning cuddling in the bed, then he left for Jakarta.

I sent him off with so much smiles.

It was my best birthday night.

Then I returned to my dorm, taking a bath.

There, I cried. Without any good explanation. I didn't even know why I couldn't control my tears. . .   .