A little rain inside me, a little pain inside me. A little dose of mellowness to compromise the life, in a precise amount.


Wednesday, July 30, 2008

The Sugar daddy

I am not the person who can even imagine me having a sugar daddy. Honestly, though, I prefer mature guys. Because usually younger guys aren’t that mature enough, I usually prefer older guys. By saying older, I mean older to some extent.

I recall that once, when I went online on mIRC, I told this guy that I preferred an older guy. He replied me by saying that he had enough money to spend on me, so he thought that his age wouldn’t be much a problem. I was kind of offended by this judgmental stranger. Anyway, as I know that he totally didn’t know me, I just ignored him.

Later, on Fridae, a stranger sent a message. Although he provided a pretty detailed profile, he got no pic. Anyway, as I was trying to be friendly, I checked on his message. He said he wanted to be a friend, and if I was interested, I could send him a message over his yahoo. For a moment, I hesitated. On one hand, he’s Caucasian, and I have I thing for Caucasians. On the other hand, he’s already around 40s. So I heard me talking to myself: Caucasians have life only after 40, and I had really nothing to lose if I gave it a try. I will grow old some day, and I don’t wanna be rejected everywhere just because of it. It’s simple karma thing, don’t treat anybody the way you don’t wanna be treated. Right?

So, I sent him a message, trying to be friendly. I learnt that he’s nice, friendly, smart, and kind. He talked about many things, and I got addicted to his news. To end my agony, I offered phone number exchange. He agreed, and since, he called me regularly.

It was only a matter of time that he told me his passion about me. And it was also only a matter of time I found out his dark side. He’s very dominant; whenever you’re trying to give him some critics, he would attack you back. He’s also very possessive. So I told him that we’re moving too fast that we started to hurt each other. We fought once or twice, but we’re always able to solve it. Basically, I enjoyed much, until the truth came.

Truth hurt. Yet I prefer truth, more than lie. I learnt that he’s actually around 60s, not 40s. I hesitated once again. Should I go on with the relationship? Should I stop it right here? He said that the decision was only mine. I really didn’t know what to do. So, I asked 4 friends. And it’s only one of four who supported me going on. The rest said no. Partly because of the age gap. He’s away too old for me. My ex even told me that people like him would treat you very nice, so I shouldn’t be tricked.

I told him then, that I needed time, alone, to consider about this. He agreed. And with me being single now, I guess that you already know the result. He had another boyfriend now, which is younger than me, and he’s incredibly happy. I’m more than glad to hear it.

Anyway, this experience taught me one thing. Love comes unconditionally. When it comes, people should be enjoying it, despite the pain and agony it brings. It is blind and it is beautiful. It makes you walking proud beside. It makes you fight harder. And moreover, it is truth.

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