Hey YOU

They said, one of the most important thing a human being could give to his kind is the chance to say something. The chance to share something. That's why I came to you. That's why I came to you to talk about me. But then, you weren't even listening. Perhaps I was not worth it. Perhaps I have never been, this whole time, at all. Perhaps I said too much. Perhaps I was not so important at all. Perhaps I am nobody. Perhaps all of that.

But I can't be like keep wondering whether it's too much, it's not important, too meaningless and so on, whenever I need to talk to you about something. After all, a chance to say something sad is not too much to ask, is it?

Do you remember things you shared about your then-ex-boyfriend? I seriously worried about you and him. I seriously tried to solve the things, to give some inputs to you - though finally you had to break-up with him. Do you know how I felt about it? Do you remember that you told me once that you didn't know how to make friends with PLU? And so many many other things, but I have never once used it against you. Then the way you told me that it's not your fault, that it's on my own, that it's my problem and mine only. Let's not point finger. I didn't blame you. But I have never been so alone upon reading what you had to say, both times. And the way you used 'you push people away, Ed' on me and suddenly everything is my own problem and you can't help me with it?

No, I am not trying to be calculative. I dont expect you to do the same to me.  But I do have rights to draw the line. I have the rights to say 'this is it, I have had enough'. So this is it.


Do you remember that you said I'd find myself more this year? Perhaps you're right, and I have you to thank for that. Whatever my value to you is, I don't care anymore. I wont give a crap about what you say, what you think no more. What for? Sometimes, you just have to be smart enough to walk away...