A little rain inside me, a little pain inside me. A little dose of mellowness to compromise the life, in a precise amount.

-Self-Quote-

Thursday, January 10, 2013

the meet me halfway

I always thought that difference was not a problem in a relationship. There's this naive boy inside me who chose to believe that even two completely-opposite guys could date long as it was love. A dork could be made for a hunk, someone who really hates the football could fall for a soccer player, and so on. Because there's no other us - we're each a unique person. People are created differently.

But the thing is, at what point do we draw the line?

It was when I saw this comic drawn by someone: a geek with long hair and beard was dating a super hot girl. His wardrobe was superheroes themed, and all in all you can say at first that he got a nice catch with the girl. Then the girl started to change him: she asked him to wear polo shirts instead, to shave his beard, and have his hair cut. By the end of the panels, she was dumping him. So it made me wonder: when two completely opposite people are dating, how long does it take before they start to try to change each other? And do you go along with that? Do you just walk out? Where do we really draw the line? Do you change yourself and then demand things from your significant other? Where is the halfway?

For me, I can't say much: I would give it a chance before call it end. At some point, it's not about 'changing' that very person, but more to 'accepting' them as they are.

Back to a few years ago, when I first moved to B-town, I met several people: we started to hang out and befriend each other. Then things happened: we each learnt our flaws. We had fights. I had fights. All four of us were falling out each other. But then we managed to be friends again. We learnt to accept the flaws, we learnt to accept each other. And I think when it comes to relationship, we need to be that accepting too...

The thing is, when it comes to relationship, acceptance is a difficult and expensive trait - or so I think. At the moment you become too attached to someone, you start to think: what is the best for them? And suddenly you just find yourself forcing things to your significant other - exactly just like when we're little kids, and our parents would try to teach us things. Is it something wrong? Offensive? Harmful? Frankly, I don't know.

But I do know that when it is not working, it is just not working.

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